I didn't want to believe my dad was stealing from his job as a road worker...

setup: I didn’t want to believe my dad was stealing from his job as a road worker…

[BILL] qua ex-CalTrans worker, in day-glo vest, back of car open, looking both ways Hey! Need a road sign? Need a road sign?

((People walking by. Avoiding [BILL]))

[BILL] hawking Hey! I got road signs here! You gotta get the divided highway! Look at them arrows around the median! It’s got glass sand in the paint! Only $3 dollars and I throw in a free reflector for your bike!

((People walking by. Avoiding [BILL]))

[BILL] Hey! I got road signs here! Lookie here! It’s ONE WAY! Tell everyone it’s your way or the HIGHWAY! Yep, there’s only ONE WAY and it’s my way! Tell the world you matter! Only $3 dollars and a free reflector! Put it on your bike! Don’t get run over! Only $3!

((People walking by. Avoiding [BILL]))

[BILL] depressed This isn’t working out at all…

punchline: But when I got home all the signs were there.