Did you hear they arrested the Energizer Bunny?

metadad · by Bill Berger

setup: Did you hear they arrested the Energizer Bunny?

[KayCEE] qua police woman, dressed as go-go dancer Whoop! Whoop! Lookie! Lookie!

[Manyfeek] qua [KayCEE]’s sentient navel ((SMALL SQUEAKY VOICE)) Yeah! Let’s finally nab that [Mario]. We’ll need to hide our true identity from him. He saw me the last time and I’m pretty sure he’ll remember me.

[BILL] qua Sgt Crowley, through [KayCEE]’s earpiece Put on your disguise. He’s been drinking a bit so now is a good time to go.

[KayCEE] putting on Princess Peach mask Yep. I just need to reel him in. Let’s get closer now.

(([KayCEE] approaches [Mario] from across the room))

[KayCEE] dancing for [Mario] and his table Whoop! Whoop! Lookie! Lookie! Any of you guys up for a private dance in the champagne room?

[Mario] very thirsty, intoxicated Hey! You are a peach-a, no? Yes, pretty lady, I’d love a private dance.

(([KayCEE] leads [Mario] to champagne room))

[KayCEE] looking sultry at [Mario] Hey, baby, you know, I dance best with just a bit of alfredo. You wouldn’t have any pasta on you?

[Mario] slurring Baaaaby! I always-a got-a a-a the pasta.

(([Mario] pulls out small camp stove. Starts boiling noodles))

[KayCEE] Oh. How nice, but I can just have the alfredo. You have the cream, butter and cheese, yes?

[Mario] agreeing Yeah. I always carry some on me.

(([Mario] pulls out a small case))

[KayCEE] pulls gun! FREEZE! You’re under arrest!

[Mario] confused, hands-up Peach?! You’re a narc?

[KayCEE] triumphant, pulling off mask That’s right baby, this peach is rotten to the core!

[Mario] angry Damn you, police wom…

(([Energizer Bunny] blasts through wall! Champagne room starts to collapse))

[Energizer Bunny] beating drum, spinning and moving I keep going… and going… and going… There is no rest for me. Eternal disruption forever…

(([Mario] escapes in the confusion!))

[KayCEE] furious Damn, Bunny! That’s obstruction. You’re coming with me.

[Energizer Bunny] Please pull the battery, please?!

punchline: He was charged with battery.