Air used to be free at the gas station.

metadad · by Bill Berger

setup: Air used to be free at the gas station.

[BILL] qua Quaid We need to find the mutant leader!

[Shakes] qua Mahleenah OK. The mutant bar is right over here. Come with me.

(([BILL] and [Shakes] enter mutant bar)) ((FUNKY MUSIC STARTS))

[Manyfeek] qua ThreeBreastedHooker, opening top, eyes dead inside See anything you like?!

[BILL] I’ve no tahheem for dis! Cohaagen’s men are neeer.

[Shakes] pushing open secret panel This way! [BILL] hurry.

(([BILL] and [Shakes] exit as [Michael Ironside] arrives and kills [Manyfeek]))

(([BILL] and [Shakes] run down secret hallway. Arrive in entry level))

(([GAMS] is waiting for them there))

[GAMS] awaiting with speech synthesizer Are you here to see Kuato?

[BILL] Yes! Where eees ee?

[GAMS] opening metal plate slowly Don’t be freaked out when you see him? He’s a little odd looking.

[KayCEE] qua Kuato, emerges from [GAMS] metal plate [BIIIIIILLLLL] open your mind. [BIIIIIIIIILLLLL] open your min…

(([Benny] shoots [KayCEE] in the forehead))

[BILL] qua Quaid running away with [Shakes] [Benny]! You traitor! Tell Cohaagen. Give doze people free AIR!

punchline: Now it costs $2.50. You want to know why? Inflation.