Why do seagulls fly over the sea?

setup: Why do seagulls fly over the sea?

[BILL] qua old seagull, speaking wisely Listen young gull.

[Shakes] qua young seagull, looking on Yes. Wise one?

[BILL] Seek the sea my lad. Stay far from the coast. Travel far.

[Shakes] Ah. Yes. Adventure! The high se…

[BILL] No. Nothing of the sort. Flying over bodies of water that are partially or fully contained by land poses risks to gulls.

[Shakes] What kind of risks? Hunters? Predators?

[BILL] Again. Totally off. No. Our kind, if over a body of water that is generally bounded by land in some fashion, well, if that happens, we turn into bakery goods.

[Shakes] WHAT?! That’s not possible.

[BILL] Wow! Where have you been? My mother crossed a river? Boom! Maple bar. I pecked at her with tears in my eyes.

[Shakes] YOU ATE YOUR MOTHER?

[BILL] No, I ate a maple bar. My grandfather, he crossed a fjord: strudel. Like that, and no whipped cream. But, you know nothing goes to waste.

[Shakes] i need to rest. this is too much.

[BILL] It’s going to be fine. It’s a good life, but yeah, stay away from the bay.

punchline: Because if they flew over the bay, they would be bagels.