How do you make an octopus laugh?

setup: How do you make an octopus laugh?

[Open Mic Host] qua too-loud Hawaiian shirt, headset mic, faux-leather barstool Aaaand please welcome to the stage, all the way from the Atlantic Trench — give it up for Larry!

(([Larry] WHEELS HIMSELF ONSTAGE IN A WATER-FILLED CONTAINER ON A DOLLY. EIGHT ARMS GENTLY WAVING.))

[Larry] qua medium-sized octopus, glasses balanced on his beak Thanks. Thanks. Wow. Tough room. Lot of fish out there.

((CRICKETS. ACTUAL CRICKETS — TWO ON A LILY PAD IN THE FRONT ROW.))

[Larry] Anyway. So I’m in the ocean. Right? And I’m thinking. I’m thinking. Where is everybody? Then I remember — we’re all in the ocean.

((SILENCE. ONE CRICKET TURNS TO THE OTHER.))

[Shakes] qua sound technician with a smile, beaming This is the best of all possible open mics.

[Larry] Okay tough crowd. Anyone here from the Atlantic? Anyone? Just me?

[Manyfeek] qua scientific octopus-research diving suit on a hanger backstage ((FROM THE WINGS)) He bombs every Tuesday. We’re going to lose this gig.

[Open Mic Host] ((FROM SIDE OF STAGE)) Larry. Crowd work. Try crowd work.

[Larry] ((LOOKING AT THE FRONT ROW)) Sir. Hi sir. Where are you from?

[Audience Member] qua a small flounder lying flat on a stool The same ocean as you, Larry.

[Larry] Right. Right. We are all in the same ocean.

((LONG SILENCE.))

[Open Mic Host] Larry. Plan B. Plan B.

[Larry] ((SIGHING WITH ALL EIGHT ARMS)) Okay. Self-tickle.

(([Larry] REACHES OUT WITH FOUR ARMS, USES THE OTHER FOUR TO TICKLE HIS OWN MANTLE))

[Larry] ((HELPLESSLY)) Hahahaha. Hahahaha. Hahahaha.

((THE AUDIENCE BURSTS INTO LAUGHTER, FINALLY.))

[Larry] ((MID-LAUGH)) This is the only thing that works. Every time.

[Open Mic Host] Give it up for Larry the Octopus, ladies and gentlemen.

punchline: With ten-tickles.