Did you hear about the guy who invented Lifesavers?

metadad · by Bill Berger

setup: Did you hear about the guy who invented Lifesavers?

[BILL] qua Dr. Malcolm Sayer I think we should try this?

[Shakes] qua nurse Are you sure? He hasn’t had anything like this in years. I mean, we’ve given him Vicks Vapo-Rub. But it only makes his nostrils flare?

[BILL] What does he have to lose?

[Shakes] It’s just so minty. He might seize?

[Manyfeek] qua Robert DeNiro, drooling, staring ((SILENT))

(([BILL] takes small white donut from pill bottle)) (([BILL] puts Lifesaver into [Manyfeek]’s mouth))

[Manyfeek] eyes widen ((SILENT))

[Shakes] DOCTOR! It’s working!

[Manyfeek] awake ::OBSCENITY REDACTED::! Wintergreen! Where is the butter rum, dude!

[BILL] Ha! Sure, I’ll make some butter rum right now…

[Manyfeek] ((SILENT))

[BILL] angry WHY! WHY! ACH. OK, I need to try peppermint. Back to the lab.

punchline: They say he made a mint.